We wish you many blessings this Holiday Season and for the New Year to come …

In this issue:

• Quote of the month
• Article of the month: The Art of Living an Empowered Life – Part 2
• Question of the month
• Recommended book
• Upcoming Events
  

Quote of the month:

“Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.”

                            - William James. Psychologist and Author. 1842-1910

What a wonderful quote to remind us that despite the “busyness” of the Season, taking a few moments to smile and sincerely thank the clerk who’s helped us at the store, or visiting an elderly neighbour who is alone at this time of the year really does make a difference.

Article of the Month

Last month we featured the first part of the Art of Living an Empowered Life. We learned about the 6 pillars of self-esteem and how empowering practicing these pillars can be. This month, we will look at what might be in our way of living these pillars: Limiting self-beliefs

The Art of Living an Empowered Life – Part 2

- By Anne Bourke

Our belief systems are another area that can create issues with our self-esteem

Limiting beliefs restrict our personal power and may even disempower us. It takes time and effort to look at these beliefs formed over a lifetime. Here are six limiting beliefs that you can reflect upon. Trying to change each belief toward a more expansive place is useful and rewarding.

1. Life is a struggle. Things are hard. Life is difficult. If things are going well, watch out!
   
   How does this belief effect how you live your life?

2. I’m an Unworthy Person- Something is wrong with me. I’m not good enough. I don’t deserve to be happy, healthy, prosperous, loved.
   
   How does this belief effect how you live your life?

3. I Don’t Trust Myself- I’m afraid to trust my feelings, intuition and my decisions. I’m afraid to let go of individual control and let my intuition guide me.
   
   How does this belief effect how you live your life?

4. Fear of Failure, Fear of Success, Fear of Power- I’m afraid to take a risk, for fear I will fail or succeed. If I fail, others will reject me. If I succeed, others will envy me, want something from me. I’ll be isolated. I won’t be able to uphold my image.
   
   How does this belief effect how you live your life?

5. I am Powerless- I don’t have the power to create my life. I’m a victim of outside circumstances. I’m helpless. Other people do things to me. I’m not responsible for what happens to me.
   
   How does this belief effect how you live your life?

6. Scarcity- There is not enough to go around of whatever I want. Therefore, I have to do without or grab more than my share and cause others to do without, or grab it while I have the chance.
   
   How does this belief effect how you live your life?

How can you change each of these beliefs so that you can see some truth in each one and you are moving towards a more positive, expansive place?

Another area that impacts on our self-esteem is our ability to be assertive and forthright in our interactions with others. Caroline Myss says that to develop self-esteem we have to have the courage to step up. She poses many good questions for self-reflection in this regard.

• What is a boundary that you cannot maintain?
• What do you feel unable to do in your life that you want to do?
• Do you give someone else the steering wheel and take a back seat in your life?
• Are you afraid to become empowered?
• Do you base your sense of self on looks and physical health? If so, look deeper.
• Where do you feel less with others?
• Whose approval do you need in life and why?
• What are you capable of?
• How do you try to bring up your self-esteem?
• How afraid are you of what your life would look like if you become empowered?  

Finding Our True Self:

Who are you when no-one else is looking?
Our different selves may be centred around roles we play: mother, lover, employee, boss…Public versus private selves: Do you expend a lot of energy putting on a mask, a ‘persona’?

Experts suggest that we should focus on being one self instead of many selves. This integration work is our life work, I believe.

Are you your true self or who others want you to be? Do you behave so that others will accept you or do you behave so that you are happy with yourself?

Self-esteem is gained when we take the best of all the selves we have and work to make that our one self, to whom we are true.

Empowerment is Bringing Action to Self-esteem & Taking Charge of Co-creating Our Own Reality:

• Healthy self-esteem involves moving toward self-forgiveness, eradicating the negative voice inside of us one thought at a time.
• Make one commitment and earn the respect of our own spirit.
• Look for unfinished business, any undones and give up the fantasy of what could have, should have been.
• Expand the compassionate side of our heart.
• Hold ourselves accountable by giving up blame and taking responsibility for our life.
• When we maintain chaos in a certain area of our life, it lets us off the hook. Be committed to uncovering these areas and making changes.
• Use our personal power to transform the limiting beliefs and create an evolving life vision to sustain ourselves in our lifetime.
• Have a daily goal to practice healthy self-esteem. Choose a task each day that helps to demonstrate what we have to offer ourselves and the world. Once we can acknowledge the gifts we possess, we can develop further positive feelings of self through laughter, spiritual thought, exercises, risk-taking, contemplation, positive visualization, creativity and personal integrity.

Activity “I am Certain”
List at least 10 things about your own abilities, skills and talents about which you are certain. 

I am certain that I……….
Of which statement are you most proud?
What one thing do you wish was on your list that is not there? Why?
What would this one thing do to help your self-esteem?

We can begin to reflect on the many pieces of our life that contributes to the balance of peace and nurture. Look for the mix of relationship, work, fun, laughter, giving, and well-being…the elements that bring us to our own true self, our own harmony.

Self-esteem is always a slippery slope. By possessing the tools to nurture ourselves and protect ourselves, the slope is less steep and more manageable.

We must all remember:

I am the only one who has the power and the clout to make my life work for me. Only I can control what I allow to influence my feelings, my actions, my attitudes, and my thoughts of worth and self-esteem.

So, I choose happiness, I choose peace, I choose challenge, I choose love, I choose giving, I choose laughter, I choose growth, I choose integrity, I choose forgiveness, and I choose wisely. These choices will change my life forever!

Question of the Month:

Who are you, when no one is looking?

Recommended book:

This month’s recommended book is really a link: http://www.mayyoubeblessedmovie.com/

Women's Well-Being Circle :

Take the opportunity to learn, listen, share and laugh at our evenings of interactive discussions, activities and personal reflection. We focus on women's challenges, strategies and energizing exercises to promote personal growth for well-being

These circles are held the third Tuesday of every month .

The next Women's Circle is on January 23, 2007 from 7:30 pm to 9:30 pm at 190 Robert Speck Parkway in Mississauga.  We will have a special showing of the movie “The Secret”, followed by a discussion.

Contact us for more information